Mittens update, conference letter, article

Dear Families,

We have been using blue stretch mittens for all the children at outside time. Children put on a pair after they have first put on their outside clothes. They may take them off for picking berries. Now that they have used them for a few days, I observe that most children seem content with the mittens; they are light enough that they allow the children to feel their hands enough to, say, use a shovel in the sandbox. When we gather at the ropes course shelter for our snack, children take off their mittens. Kim and I give new pairs of mittens after snack to replace wet mittens. I collect the mittens again right before we gather for the closing circle.

Since the blue mittens seem to work for all the children in the class, I recommend taking other mittens and gloves home, or to have some ready in your car. One of my goals is to avoid having your mittens get lost at school.

Even though I purchased a lot of mittens, it will be important to keep track of them (another way to say this is because I purchased a lot of mittens I have to be extra vigilant or else I may lose them all). Their effectiveness is that they are easy to put on, allow children to retain a sense of touch and dexterity, AND can be replaced when they become wet and hands become cold. If blue mittens come home with your child, please return them. Kim washed particularly sandy mittens with children in the classroom today. It was a harmonious and healthy activity that delighted many children. Because there will sometimes be a wet set of mittens drying on the rack, we need multiple changes for the children, and I expect and hope our class to grow in size to twelve or close to twelve as we proceed in the year. Thank you for your help in keeping track of the mittens.

Children thrive when given the opportunity to participate in meaningful, tangible work--or to play in the presence of such work. Kim and I have been getting the children outside particularly early so that we can move sand from the big pile to the oven shelter for 45 minutes to an hour before taking our walk to our various places in the woods. Today I gave a number of children "sand" rides in the wheelbarrow.

I have filed printed copies and sent electronic copies of a conference preparation letter to families who have signed up by Tuesday. Here is a copy of the letter even if you choose to wait until spring or another time for a conference. Whenever you do come for a conference, it is most helpful if you provide me answers to the question in advance.

Whether you come to a conference next week or not, I encourage you to read this "Open Letter to a Mother of a 'Stuttering' Child." This is an old article. It may not even reflect current research by speech experts. It was given to me by a professor at the University of Maryland when I was training to become a public school nursery or kindergarten teacher; she found it to be one of the most helpful articles she had ever read about the importance of allowing children time to develop before fixing them with a label. As you will read in the article, the author and other researchers found that the most potent cause of stuttering was the diagnosis of stuttering. All children stumble over words and repeat from time to time; it was only once a parent or teacher regarded this normal disfluency as a problem that speech became more difficult.

I find many analogies with my work with children birth to 5. Children do not begin as miniature models of perfect adults (if there were such a thing) but develop in their own way and in their own pace. Some children may learn to ride a bike at 3, others much later. Some will be ready to solve conflicts with the words of Nelson Mandela or Gandhi from toddlerhood; most will use less beautiful forms of physical or verbal force as they learn how to be an individual in a group. Some children will pronounce all consonants at an early age. For some children, it is still normal for some consonants, especially blends, to wait until age 6 or beyond.

I am not advocating we ignore all medical professionals or other experts. There will be children for whom an early intervention provides tremendous benefits. For most children, even children with profound special needs, what we offer in Waldorf early childhood education and home life--real, meaningful work done artistically by a present adult in a nourishing enviroment that invites imitation and free movement and inspires the imagination, all within a strong rhythm that provides structure and predictabilty, while providing a life free from the over/understimulation of media, overscheduling, judgment, and rushing--already provides developmental help for all children.

Over the years, I find at conference times I spend less time comparing a child to the norms for an age and more time describing objectively what I see the child doing and hear the child saying. As I grow more experienced, I even wonder about my ability to report on a specific child's experience. As Susan Weber told me, we as teachers (and parents) have to be very careful about assuming we know how a child experience's things. A child might watch me move a pile of sand without ever coming to the pile. I might report to the parents about how the child watched intently and did not move. The child might report to the parents that she worked very hard and filled the wheelbarrow over and over and made many trips with the sand. Young children can live very much in a "we" consciousness. The child's report is more accurate than my observation; that was the experience for the child (and the reason why as teachers and parents we do children a great service when we bring intention and beauty to every physical act we do). In twenty years, parents and I might sit in silence at conference time, allowing the enormity of the miracle of child development and imitation to encompass us. In the mean time, I will do my best to keep communication open between home and school.

With warmth and light,

William Geoffrey Dolde

Conference Sign-up in lobby, Advent

Dear Families,

      To make matters clearer for families with more than one child in the school, the early childhood conference sign-up sheet is upstairs in the lobby.  This enables parents to coordinate multiple conferences.  It is also different from the form in past years and may have caused some confusion.  I apologize if it has done so.

      You are welcome to sign up for a half hour conference for next Tuesday and Wednesday.  You are welcome to wait until the April conferences.  You are welcome to try to set up a conference for some other time.  Do know that beginning after Thanksgiving I will be working with kindergarten and first grade children in after care every day (the early childhood faculty is supporting the school's budget by taking on extra responsibilities) and may have very limited availability for additional meetings during those those months.

      If you choose to have a conference next week, teachers ask that you sign up by Tuesday afternoon.  We have a conference preparation form we want to give you on Wednesday to be returned to us by Friday.

     We have a meeting with the kindergarten families this Tuesday from 5 to 8pm in Thomas Berry Hall at the Whidbey Institute.  Please ask if you need directions (continue down Old Pietila road rather than turning left for the school).  If you need assistance with child care, please let me or Belinda know; it is possible a kindergarten family in your neighborhood could help out, and I will have the kindergarten class coordinators check.

     Beginning with the Lantern Walk, many of the Autumn and Winter festivals of light provide great nourishment to children and their families during the darkness of winter.  In Waldorf schools, Advent is presented as a time of preparation and waiting for light in the darkness.  Many stories, poems, and display depict the four weeks of Advent in this way:  first the stones and crystals are aware; next the plants; third the animals; finally the people become aware of the coming of the light.  In my effort to convey the essence of festival life with simplicity to young children, I find the actual lighting of the candles and the singing of "Advent, advent, a candle burns" (some of your children will probably sing this to you) with a simple poem about stones, plants, animals, or people to convey the story of light in darkness.  To keep with my goal of allowing time for everything and avoiding all sense of rush, I like to start my advent "wreathe" (no greenery yet) with sea shells four weeks before the winter break.  This year this means this week.  Even as your children and I string cranberries to decorate for Thanksgiving and watch a puppet show about sharing a pumpkin, we will start lighting an Advent candle and singing an Advent song at snack time (in a similar way, I light a Menorah for the last 8 nursery school days before the winter break to give the full of experience of candles building school day by school day).  I realize that my early celebration of Advent could make me seem guilty of joining the rush of marketers trying to extend the Christmas shopping season, but my intention is different and therefore, I hope, forgivable.  Children seem to enjoy the time I allow for ample repetition.

With warmth and light,

William Dolde

Butterfly Nursery and Children's Garden November newsletter

printed copies in folders at school Monday, November 3

Upcoming Events and Closings

Please contact me if you have any questions. wdolde@gmail.com; 341-5686.

Lantern Walk, Friday, November 7, 5:30pm. Please refer to the email Kim Dunkley sent; printed copies of details about the lantern walk, along with the music to "Glimmer, Lantern, Glimmer" are in your folders at school. We will strive to sing this lantern song at the 12:25 closing each day to help parents learn the song. Children and I have been working on lanterns together in class. It is inherent to the cooperative mood of our nursery class that we all make lanterns that anyone can use. Each nursery child will take home a lantern that we all had a hand in oiling.

Veteran's Day, Tuesday, November 11. No School.

Parent Evening with the Kindergarten Families, Tuesday, November 18, 5 to 8pm. Thomas Berry Hall at the Whidbey Institute. Michael Hansen will be working with us to craft a social vessel that supports our children. We will be accepting donations to cover the cost of the venue.

Thanksgiving Week, teacher in-service, parent & teacher conferences, November 24 - 28. No School. I will make conference sign-up times available soon. Early childhood families are asked to attend either a fall or a spring conference with me. You are welcome to attend both. Please let me know if you want to have a conference before Thanksgiving week. I can sometimes make space for a conference on a Monday or Tuesday early afternoon.

Children's Holiday Workshop, Saturday, December 6.

Advent Spiral, Evening, Friday, December 12.

OTHER IMPORTANT DETAILS

Mittens accomplished, perhaps. I did find a reasonable price on a host of stretch mittens--all the same color--from a skating shop. They have not arrived yet, but I expect them soon. Because the 90 - 100 minute outside time seems so nourishing for our nursery children, and because this outside time includes a snack (at which we take off our mittens), finding something easy to put on and off seems all the more important. This is an experiment, so I am not sure if it will work. At present, don't worry about seeking other school mittens yourself.

Checking cubby supplies and taking things home. The transition from inside to outside can be the most challenging one for a nursery class. Over the years I have really tried to alter the mood of this transition--we draw children outside with the possibility of playing in the sand or swings rather than forcing all children to sit inside while waiting for every child to be ready (my experience and observation is that this punishes cooperative children who get dressed quickly and then have to sit inside and sweat in their rain clothes while waiting for others). It helps this transition if Kim and the children can find the right supplies easily. Please check your child's cubby and take home treasures, extra pairs of gloves (once mittens arrive), artwork, and the like. This will help with the transition.

Mailboxes for children inside the classroom. Please check the painting paper mailboxes just inside the classroom door. Much of my work with children birth to 5 is to draw out the generosity and interest in cooperation that is already present at birth (following the wisdom of Waldorf master teachers Rena Osmer, Susan Weber and the wisdom of Emmi Pikler and Magda Gerber). I have found over the years that if I create the form (for example, mailboxes; trips to give soup to the receptionist) that makes it easier for children to give to one another and adults, the children are more likely to realize the intrinsic reward of giving. There may be weeks or month when children do not draw or make things for each other. There may be times when many children do. Both are fine. Some children may want to collect treasures or make things for classmates at home; some children won't. This culture of interest in the other makes discipline much more effective. If children are already in the habit of giving to one another, they are more likely to be willing to make amends and help restore things if they have taken a toy, pushed or hit a child, or used judgmental words with a peer. Restoration rather than punishment tends to be much more effective in bringing about a safe and inclusive classroom.

My paper mailboxes are but temporary solution. If you see something at a thrift store or feel inspired to build wooden mail cubbies for inside the classroom, please let me know. Ideally, these would have space for twelve mailboxes.

Mentoring and Evaluation While the feedback I receive from most parents seems to indicate that they are pleased with their child's experience in the nursery class, do also know that as a new teacher to this school I will be undergoing a formal evaluation this Friday and next Monday. A lot of my practices in the classroom have developed through years of observing children, reading works about Waldorf education and child development, and from meditating upon and trying what work best for the particular children in my care. I always benefit from outside insight, which I will receive a healthy dose of this weekend.

Kim Dunkley of the Golden Forest Kindergarten is my mentor. While we encourage parents to speak to teachers directly, with a teacher new to the school such as myself you do have the option of speaking to Kim if you feel you cannot speak to me or if you are not satisfied by my response.

Bulletin Board and Blog

Some parents have let me know they find the blog helpful. Although some of the pdfs may be challenging to read on some computer screens, I like that I am conserving paper and that the articles are in a place easy for you to find should you want to refer to them in the future. In my first year at the Waldorf School of Baltimore, I received some feedback that I gave parents too much to read and a wish from other parents that I would give even more. I will try to provide a balanced amount of articles with the expectation that some parents will seek more and some won't read many at all. In my parent & child classes, I try to provide a new article every week. Often these articles may be of interest to you, too. Rather than cluttering your inbox with more emails, I invite you to check out the parent & child blog from time to time (an easy way to get there is to go to my profile on our nursery blog). When possible, I will post a printed copy of short articles I write or find on the bulletin board for you to read when you have time. When possible, I will provide a printed copy of pdf articles on the window ledge outside the classroom. A copy of a conversation from Difficult Children -- There is No Such Thing is there now.

Another conversation from Difficult Children -- There is No Such Thing

At our initial parent evening, I spoke of two conversations from this book. One, a conversation about Robert, I made available about a month ago. Here, now, is a conversation about a 7 year old named Miriam. (On some computers, the pdf can be hard to read on the screen. If you print it out, the text should be clearer. Again, there is a printed copy outside the classroom to read.) While this child is older and the parent's interactions are different than they would be with a nursery child, I find the principles very helpful, and they help clarify some of the practices I use in the classroom. A lot of what I do, for example, is to help children learn that obligation is not necessarily odious--that what the child wants to do and should do are not necessarily in conflict. Even as our school as a whole works on standards of behavior and discipline, it is important to keep in mind what the author/therapist tells us about the inherent coldness of commands and the antipathy they necessarily summon forth in our children. Parenting and teaching is challenging work: indeed, the challenge is the benefit for us. At the same time we need to be loving authorities, that we need to set limits and establish boundaries, we have to be willing to go the extra step of guiding our children with warmth and imagination and clarity. I encourage you to read this pdf and share it with parents in other classes if you think they would be interested. You could feel free to take the printed copy outside the classroom and ask Rebecca to make a copy, or check the book out yourself from the library.

As I have said before, these conversations between therapist and parent are moments of transparency in an otherwise incredible and dense and sometimes hard to read book. If anybody would like to start a reading group to study this book, please let me know and I would be willing to find time to participate. Henning Koehler's book Working with Anxious, Nervous, and Depressed Children seems easier to read, and I recommend it as well (copies in the Kathrine Dickerson library). This book provides lengthy descriptions of how to nourish the sense of touch, life (well-being), self-movement (proprioception), and balance (vestibular system) in all children, anxious or not.

Circle and the Power of Imitation

Circle time--a time when children sing or move or gesture together with the teacher--can be a time for misbehavior in the nursery class. When Bonnie Freundlich visits for eurythmy every morning (we will be invited to a parent evening about eurythmy in January), children tend to attend very well. I expect every child to be able to watch or follow along. I am prepared--as has had to happen in past years but has not been necessary this year--to have Kim remove a child from the classroom if the child is too disruptive or to create a safe space for a child to watch from a distance if the presence of another teacher in the classroom is too overwhelming. The children seem quite comfortable with Bonnie and thrilled with what she offers. They repeat Bonnie's rhymes about the cobbler later in the morning or the next day.

One of the strengths of Waldorf Early Childhood education is that we provide form in a healthy way. While other schools are imposing more and more academic form and homework in the early years (with very mixed results; see www.allianceforchildhood.org for information on work and play), form in a Waldorf School comes from the careful attention of the adults to the rhythms of the day, week, and year. In light of this, I made a very conscious decision a few years ago to offer a circle of traditional singing games ("Fiddle me up to London Town," "Jim Along Josie," and "Grand Old Duke of York" among others) outside without compelling any child to join me. The games would emerge in the right spot while children were playing, and children would come freely out of imitation and interest. While this has worked more or less over the years, I am struck by the profound enthusiasm many of our Butterfly children show for this outdoor circle time. At the beginning of the year, most children came; when they learned they did not have to come, many children played elsewhere; now, many children come running the moment I start singing, "We feed the chickens every day, singing as we go." I would have expected to have to augment the circle with new songs (which I have ready), but the children seem so nourished by and enthusiastic for the repetition. Obedience does not necessarily have to be for an adult. In this case, I think the children and I are being obedient to higher wisdoms such as the wisdom of generations that created these archetypal singing games.

As our school looks at behavior school wide, I have heard comments that some parents are concerned that because early childhood teachers allow children to sit out, this habit persists into the grades. In our parent evenings, I feel from all of you that we are in agreement that the nursery class is a very different place from first grade or fourth grade or 7th grade. Many parents like Waldorf education because it continues to recognize that children have different needs at different developmental stages. By working out of imitation and obedience to higher forms with the nursery children, my goal is to cultivate children who love to participate in circle and music in the grades because it is inherently joyful to do so; they wouldn't even think of misbehaving in a first grade circle because they can sense the gift they will get from singing and moving together. While I would support another nursery teacher who chooses to have a different place and expectations for circle, my hope is that you will support me if you hear a parent bemoaning the lack of discipline and using the example, "The nursery teacher doesn't even force the children to come to circle." People are welcome to their own opinion, of course, but please refer that parent to the blog and possibly a meeting with me so we can share where our opinions are coming from.

Dragons, Parades, Teacher's Imagination, Needs of All the Children

In my last entry, I wrote of examples where children resolved conflicts themselves. I think it fair to ask what I might do to help children when they seem stuck in play that is becoming loud or aggressive. Since Michaelmas, more than a handful of children have pretended to be dragons at one point or the other. As long as the dragons have not been aggressive toward others, Kim and I have allowed this play as a healthy and necessary way to process the Michaelmas pageant (again, one could ask whether it is appropriate for nursery children to attend the Michaelmas pageant; in some schools they do not, and I will ask myself, my colleagues, and the Parent Council this question next year). Often this play transforms itself into other games organically; dragons become dogs who have owners who seek food and rides to farms and pumpkin patches and ferries. One day five children were having a grand time pretending to be dragons breathing fire, dancing about, being loud, not really aiming their fire at anything in particular. All the same, I could see a couple of children feeling hesitant about going into that part of the room because of the vigor of the dragons. I began taking big hollow blocks and tying ropes to them and said, to no one in particular, "Dragons are often part of parades like Chinese New Year's parades, and I have also seen parades in which mountain dogs pull sleds through the town." I continued tying up sleds and began singing a New Year song and then a Kwanzaa song ("Harambee") with no expectation or requirement that anything would happen. Several children began pulling the sleds, another two children began building a fire truck for the parade, the children who had been standing back went into that part of the room and began building a house, and an occasional dragon came forth in the parade. While this approach does not always work (and indeed, we might need to redirect a child to helping with a chore or sit a child down if the child needs to collect her or himself before playing some more), situations like this happen all the time. It is not easy, but I practice and hopefully get better at redirecting play and behavior with warmth and imagination. I feel I am working toward the goals set forth in the conversation from Difficult Children - There is no Such Thing.

While I feel heartened by the cooperative and imaginative play of our nursery children and their willingness to make amends when amends need to be made, I know that as a school we are looking to clarify what we do about discipline. In your folders today, Monday, is a letter from the Children's Garden teachers about discipline. There is also an annotated version of an article about "Loving Authority".

Thank you for reading all of this. Thank you for keeping the channels of communication open.

With warmth and light,

William Geoffrey Dolde